Wednesday, August 26, 2009

The Room and Life Verses

When I found out I was pregnant it was the most exciting and terrifying moment in my life. I immediately prayed for the little baby that was growing inside of me. I did this even before running out of the bathroom to show my husband the positive pregnancy test. At 11 weeks I had some spotting and was once again terrified with fear that something was going wrong but thankfully nothing was. It was during this time that I ran across a blog of a family that had been through some trying times. They had posted a verse that spoke to me in such a deep way that I knew that it was going to be the verse that carried me through this pregnancy.

For God has not given us a spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7

When the time came to begin to come of with a life verse (something I blatantly stole from friends) for her I was searching and praying when Daddy Flamingo just looked up one evening and goes, "You should use the 2 Timothy verse for her." and it was perfect.

PS the weird net over her crib is a cat tent to keep the cats out of her crib. I don't think their going to smother her or anything but I hate the fact that I have to change the sheets all the time.

5 months old

Baby Flamingo turned five months old about a week ago. And on this day she decided to learn how to roll over. BF HATES tummy time with a passion. She would rather be anywhere than on her stomach. And what happens? She has learned to roll from her back to her stomach and cannot get off of it. It never fails that she rolls while I'm in another room (either doing laundry or making dinner) and then begins to protest quite loudly when she can't get roll to her back.

Baby Flamingo has just become more fun and more exciting with each day (and really hour). She sleeps great (I try not to say too much about this because so many of my friends have sleep issues) and has been since about 12 weeks. She's gotten a nap routine down that is somewhat predictable and this gives me enough time in the day to get all of the housewifely things done.

Last week Baby Flamingo got to meet someone in my life is quite important. She met the doctor who saved my life 20 years ago. It was such a special moment for me. To be there watching a man I look at as a father playing with my little girl. I could only imagine how surreal it was for him- seeing the girl that had grave odds, not only living but being a mom. I like to think it was pretty special for him too.

Monday, August 3, 2009

Birth Story Regrets and Mommy Guilt.

Lately I've been seeing lots of talk on my favorite mommy-blogs about birth story regrets. Women who might not have had that ideal birth and who regret it and mourn for what they didn't get.

I've never regretted that Baby Flamingo was born via c-section. Did I want a vaginal birth? Did I have those images of my husband holding my hand and urging me to push or to breathe? Did I want to see how long I could go before I begged for the epidural? Yeah, I wanted all of those things.

When they sent me down to L&D at 34 weeks pregnant to deliver I freaked out majorly. I didn't have my bag or it even finished being packed. I had almost finished her room, but still didn't have her shelves put up yet (FYI, that was finished last week), I had obviously not bought enough preemie clothes or diapers and MY MOM WASN'T HERE! I was scared and nervous and terrified that my sweet little baby had not had enough time to finish all of those developments. I knew that she'd be fine really, but it was terrifying. I wasn't in labor, but my heart was struggling a bit to support both of us... and that is where my guilt comes in.

Thankfully they doctors all decided to keep my inpatient, make me rest and watch my heart and the baby for a week, get me to 35 weeks and then deliver. I am so thankful for that week. It was during that week that my mind adjusted and accepted that I wasn't going to have that idealized birth in my head but instead going to have a realistic one that was safe for me and my sweet baby.

Have I had guilt? Not so much about my birth story, more for the fact that she was early and needed some help in the beginning... had even more about not being able to breastfeed... but as I look at my sweet little girl who gifts me with smiles and giggles... who loves for me to rock her to sleep... It is all perfect. Her birth story isn't over because her life is just beginning. I can't wait to see what kind of woman she will be.


Some things I have realized lately...

1. Baby Flamingo only wants to go to sleep if I am putting her to sleep. We are trying to work on this, but it's a challenge at times.

2. She does not care for rice cereal. She does seem to like the oatmeal more.

3. While she has not yet managed to roll over (I try not to stress out about it) she does wriggle herself all around her area. I'll lay her down at night one way and she'll be 180* by morning.

4. She likes creamcheese icing (I was working on some cupcakes and she managed to get a lick.

5. It doesn't matter what time she woke up, she'll want a nap around 10ish.